wastery:

Haters : Kill yourself 

Me :

image

(Source: wastery)

2,995 notes

scoobydoof:

mom, dad, can i have a boy girl party this year for my birthday??? i’m gonna be 35 this year and idk i just think i should be allowed to now. 

111,914 notes

booforce:

my friend who snorts cocaine won’t eat cookie dough because it’s bad for you

(Source: biforce)

590,617 notes

lindseybluth:

elijahkrantz:

There are lipstick stains on my capri sun

which lana del rey song is this from

333,349 notes

tropicalasis:

I am so thankful for all the dogs in my life

(Source: vagiants)

19,489 notes

gravityfalse:

when you and your friend see someone you hate

Milford Sound in New Zealand

505,455 notes

horror movie opening scene

  • white girl: i dont like this abandoned insane asylum, zack.
  • white boy: come on, amanda, 10 years ago tonight, the famous blood skull killer committed his last murder right here and then vanished.
  • white girl: you're just trying to scare me.
  • white boy: lmao
  • they continue walking for a few seconds
  • *white couple hears noise*
  • white girl: babe what that??
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  • *leaves her alone*
  • *choking noises*
  • white girl: zack!!!
  • white boy: ha ha just kidding!
  • white girl: asshole!
  • white boy: im just playin babe
  • white girl: that wasnt funny but ur still cute
  • *playful kiss*
  • *things turn sexy*
  • *hear noise*
  • white boy: i'll go investigate
  • *he leaves and then there's a silence for a long time*
  • *maybe a thud*
  • white girl: zack! this isnt funny anymore zack!
  • *she walks and he dead*
  • white girl: ahhh!!
  • *killer shows up with sickle or quirky weapon that distinguishes him from other horror movie villains*
  • white girl: ahhh!!!
  • *white girl runs*
  • *dead end*
  • *hides*
  • *thinks she free n safe*
  • *guy catches her*
  • *cuts her*
  • *she dead*
  • opening title slashes across screen: BLOOD SLICE IN 3-D

102,993 notes

precumming:

SINCE U BEEN GONE !!!!!!!!!!!! (since u been gone) I CAN BREATHE FOR THE FIRST TIME IM SO MOVING ON (ya ya) THANKS TO YOU (thanks to you) NOW I GET (now i get) I GET WHAT I WAAAAAAAAAANT

62,375 notes